Throughout July and August our bi-monthly series has been all about stationery; how we create it, why we create it, and the best places (on etsy) to purchase it. But, once you have all of these stationery products... what should you do with them?
Start writing people of course!
Many people have had a pen-pal at some point in life. A friend, relative, or maybe even a student in another city or country, assigned to you by a grade-school teacher. But, how do you find pen-pals now that you’re older?
Here are just a few websites that I use and have had some success with...
Start writing people of course!
Many people have had a pen-pal at some point in life. A friend, relative, or maybe even a student in another city or country, assigned to you by a grade-school teacher. But, how do you find pen-pals now that you’re older?
Here are just a few websites that I use and have had some success with...
Post Crossingwww.PostCrossing.com
How it Works: The basic gist goes - you get randomly assigned a person to send a postcard. With that assignment comes a registration code. You then send that person a postcard and include the registration number somewhere on the card. Once the person receives your postcard and has registered it, someone will be assigned to send you a postcard in return. You can work your way up to being able to send multiple postcards at a time.
Although the main point of Post Crossing is to connect with people from around the world via postcard, you can also choose to receive letters in envelopes. You can even list that you're open to being pen-pals, outside of the one-time exchange of a postcard.
The Positive: I have been using Post Crossing since 2010 and have yet to have a bad experience with this website. I have sent postcards all over the world and have received them from dozens of countries as well, which I have loved. I've had letters and continued with a pen-pal exchange as well. It's also extremely interesting to see all of the postcards from around the world and experience the different cultures in such an easy way.
The Negative: My only complaints are sometimes it can be a bit boring if you receive a bunch from the same country because postcards tend to be similar and the website seems to offer no way of blocking this from happening. Also, not everyone is open to a continuous pen-pal exchange so it's not the site to go to if that's the main thing you're looking for in a snail-mail exchange. Most prefer the one-time postcard registration.
Inter Pals: Pen-pals
www.interpals.net
How it Works: With Interpals you set up a profile, which is very similar to Facebook's "about" section. They also ask languages you speak and what countries you're interested in meeting pen-pals through, along with what gender and age group you prefer. From there you can message people privately or comment on their message board (very much like a facebook wall) to make the initial contact.
Some people just want to be continue to talk via messaging or email. However, most are there for traditional snail-mail. You choose when you feel comfortable giving out your address, and go from there!
Some people just want to be continue to talk via messaging or email. However, most are there for traditional snail-mail. You choose when you feel comfortable giving out your address, and go from there!
The Positive: I currently have three solid pen-pals using this website - one in Germany, one in Australia, and one here in the USA (Michigan). I love sharing letters with them and I would not have met them if not for Interpals. I also love that you can choose the age group, countries you're most interested in, and block people and countries you're not interested in. The versatility of this websites options probably make it my favorite of the ones listed here.
The Negative: The first night I joined Interpals I was discouraged because it felt more like a dating site than a pen-pal site. I was getting hit on by men who definitely were not interested in writing letters back and forth. I am very happily married and the attention was unwanted. Clearly this is not what I was looking for in a pen-pal website. Then an awesome person messaged me (who I am now pen-pals with) and I told her my issues with the site. She gave me some tips on how to eliminate those unwanted messages. I started blocking countries where the worst offenders came from, narrowed down my age group settings, made it even more obvious I was married by changing my profile picture, and wrote in my profile that I only wanted messages from people interested in snail mail. Now I only have a positive experience with the website.
Pen Pal World
www.penpalworld.com
How it Works: Pen Pal World is very similar to Interpals. You set up an account, set up a profile, and start the search for a pen-pal. Message anyone you feel would be a good fit, or write on their message board (wall).
The Positive: This website is incredibly easy to use and looks prettier than Interpals. It also has great tools to narrow your search and you can block countries or people as needed.
The Negative: I have yet to gain a solid pen-pal via Pen Pal World. I admit, I disabled my site for a while but am now giving it a second chance because I've seen people mentioning it more and more in the pen-pal and snail mail world. I've had some good interactions, but none that have lead to being pen-pals, yet. The reason I'm still including this on my list is because I feel it's still a good site, especially based off of reviews. Just maybe it's not for me.
But, knowing where to get a pen-pal and actually getting a pen-pal are two very different things. Especially if you’re like me and sort of timid. Here are some tips for getting a pen-pal and keeping a pen-pal:
- Be yourself and don't be afraid to message someone you find interesting. After all, you're both on a website for pen-pals so you already have one thing in common!
- Make sure you're actually writing back. I've fond that a more timely response tends to get you a better conversation.
- Remember what you wrote. Repeating yourself over and over again is not only boring for your pen-pal, it's boring for yourself. Keep a notebook with topics you wrote about in your last letter. Or even consider just running your letters through a copier before sending them out. Whatever works to keep the letter fresh in your mind.
- Ask questions! Too many people just want to talk about themselves, but without questions, a conversation is hard to maintain. Let alone one that is chopped up into waiting periods (aka: waiting for the postal service to deliver your letter, sometimes to the other side of the world. Than waiting for the reply).
- Remember things about your pen-pal. If they mentioned they had an important trip or event coming up, remember to ask them about it. If they mention a family member or friend, ask about that person from time to time. If they brought something up in a snail mail letter, it usually means it's something they like to talk about.
Lastly, sometimes people have reservations about giving out their address online. This is completely understandable; there are some creeps in this world. But, not a single site I posted above has your address out and about for just anyone to see.
Here are some basic tips about how to stay safe:
- Report of block any person who seems like they're not on the website for the intention of the website - gaining pen-pals. No one wants to put up with a creeper when there are so many awesome people to meet!
- Use a PO Box if one is available to you.
- If you are under 18 perhaps it would be best talking to a parent about this first. They can help you make sure you’re not giving your information out to anyone you shouldn’t be giving it too.
- And most importantly, if you are feeling any sort of uncomfortableness with someone, do not give them your address. It's as simple as that!
If you have any snail mail tips, tricks or websites you use that I didn’t mention above, please leave them in a comment below!
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